One Christmas, my sisters, with excited looks on their faces gave me a big gift. They told me that this was only part of the gift and the other part hadn't arrived yet. They looked so thrilled with themselves, that I couldn't wait to open it! When I did, I pulled out a canvas bag with an unexplainable circular piece of paper inside. My mom exclaimed, "It's a cooler!" Now, for those who don't know me very well. I don't cook. I haven't been grocery shopping since March 2009. That's absolutely true. I will run in and get a cookie plate for a party or something, but other than that I avoid the supermarket like the guys on match.com who take shirtless pictures of themselves in bathroom mirrors. Also, I don't really sit on grass. I hate ants, I hate beetles, I hate spiders. It seems that whenever I sit on grass, one of those is crawling on me. So, you can see why I was confused that my sisters who know me so well, would get me a cooler as a present and be excited about it.
My face fell. I tried not to let it show, but I have one of those "open book" faces. It makes it really hard to hide disappointment. My sisters looked baffled. Until Lori said, "It's not really a cooler! Are you serious?? Do you not know what that is?" I looked at it again, and realized that the circular piece of paper had three holes in it. It was a bowling ball bag! My sisters had bought me my own bowling ball! After that, I was much happier. And my family laughed and laughed at what a spoiled brat I am. I wanted to name my bowling ball Peter the Purple Pin Eater, but a friend told me that was too long. So, I named her Beth.
One other Christmas story comes to mind. My father is one of the best people in this world. He's sweet; he's kind; he's a fantastic dad! He's also horrible at listening. He had asked my mother what she wanted for Christmas and my mother said that she really needed a new winter coat and that she'd like it to be brown. I'm sure my mom was expecting something like this:
My dad bought her this:
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